flumpytripod

In the warm, wet, dark, seemingly unending cavern, a minute noise is heard far away somewhere in the blackness. After some time a more audible sound is perceived and soon louder and more frequent sounds abruptly bursts from the chasm of black. As the noises increase in abundance and intensity, wafts of warm damp air flows from the source of the noise and throughout the moist tunnel. The scent of the air is rancid and foul as it trickles through the cavern. The odor and noise begins to rise, faster and stronger. The air flowing through is now rushing through the humid, damp, dark cave. Suddenly, an enormous doughy, dank, chunky, brown object emerges from the bowels of the cavern. It is even more putrid and soggy than the wooshing air forcing it through the tunnel. The huge thing is slowly forced through the tunnel by the gas. Now the walls of the dark chasm begin to convulse in an attempt to cleanse itself of this brown, clumpy substance. The entire cavern is now violently shaking to bring the thing to its destination. As it nears the end, a dim light can be seen filtered through the clenched flabby opening of the cave. The object is finally squeezed slowly through the tight, puckering hole. Clumpy chunks of the thing hurl out of the hole and the moist, dense gas begins to fly out of the tunnel, making loud howling noises as it does so. The brown thing has finally left the hole and the last of the air leaves with it. The inside of the cavern is caked with excess grime left over from the thing's escape. It is silent for a moment, and then a satisfying, wet plop is heard faraway, outside of the tunnel.
This is a description of taking a shit. The End.